Hello people! And a big Windsor-style welcome to you all! I expect you like the new-look blog. Well, I had to spruce it up a bit, what with the election just around the corner. You never know if old Cameron's going to be logging on and checking up on us. Of course, because it's a crucial time for us politicos I'll be coming out with lots more shite than usual. Take this for example: "The Westphalia-on-Sea area has suffered from years of decline since the Lib Dems took over the Town Hall in 1990 with visitor numbers and inward investment figures falling every year that they have been in control." That's right - I'm saying that people base their choice of holiday destination on which party has overall control of the Town Hall. How mad is that? And I can talk about things that happened in 1990 even though I wasn't here. Ha ha ha! Honestly, I am so wacky - how could you not vote for me?


If you're wondering what this counter is, it tells you how much shit the country is in since New Labour adopted all our Tory policies - capitalism, eh? Don't you just love it?


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Friday 5 February 2010



WE
CAN'T
GO ON
LIKE
THIS




Honestly, the bloody waiting for polling day is killing me. I can see that fat MP's pay cheque just out of reach, but some days I swear it's getting further away instead of closer. Oh well, I suppose all good things come to those who wait. At least when May rolls around there'll be at least one family lifted out of poverty, right? (Mine - geddit?) I see old Tarquin Pompous-Duffer had to cough up eleven grand in misclaimed expenses. That's a drop in the ocean to him. After all, he did claim about £80,000 for gardening didn't he? I wouldn't mind a slice of that kind of action, I can tell you, but those were the good old days when you could claim for a duck island or a mortgage you didn't have. I bet there'll be slim pickings in the expenses department by the time I rock up at Westminster - just my rotten bloody luck! You wait; I wouldn't be surprised if I have to rub along with just the basic salary. It's enough to make you weep, it really is.
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